Battling the mundane

Saturday, November 14, 2009

By Administration

The daily struggle for me as an artist is to keep the mundane world at bay, while trying to focus on the sacred, spiritual world, from whence my creativity flows. It is a battle every day, but some days more than others. Unfortunately I must work a job (not as an artist) to pay my bills, like many others do. My job is part time and allows me days to work in the studio, market my work online, go out and take photos to work from, etc. It is a thin line, though. that keeps the grind of the world of bills, chores, and maintenance at bay. It wears at the confidence of my spirit, when nothing sells and the stock of art builds up and the part time job doesn’t bring in quite enough. Where can I turn . . . when I was young I had the strength to say ‘the hell with it’ and paint and change my life style to accommodate my artistic needs. But now, I seem worn thin by this struggle, the clock is ticking and I do not know how to stop it. Oh, some days are much better than others, I have great ideas and my paintings are, for the most part, very good. I know that the part time job is not working out right now, I should look for another. But I really want to do my art, as I near 60, the finite-ness of my life weighs heavy on me. If I could get ahead of the mundane and draw the line in the sand . . . here is where I make my stand, I am an artist and nothing more. I feel that the moment is always close, just around the bend, but then the mundane slaps me upside the head and says, “here’s a broken car, here’s a shift at work you only make 30 buck, here’s a stack of bills, here’s the flu you got no money coming in. . . ” This breaks my spirit and turns my mind to mush, I have no ideas, my paintings suck. And so it goes, I hope this rant does not come off too whiny. But I had a bad couple of weeks. I know that these spells happen from time to time. I just wish this one would end and soon!

Tags: Broken Car, Chores, Clock, Confidence, creativity, Daily Struggle, Flu, Hell, kc, Life Style, Line In The Sand, Mundane World, paintings, Part Time Job, Rant, robin muirhead, rss, rss feeds, Slaps, Spells, Spirit, Spiritual World, Stack, Thin Line

This entry was posted on Saturday, November 14th, 2009 at 13:32 and is filed under An Artist's Life, rss feeds . You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.